Day to day, or not so often, musings and bemusings of a frum farmgirl, and mother living in Philadelphia and her family and homelife adventures.
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Where are all the rest of the Bumble Bee people?
I remember back when MTV used to have really good videos,(haven't actually watched MTV since the early 90's) There was this one Blind Melon song I think called 'No Rain.' It was a decent song and it had this really cute video of a sweet little girl in a bumble bee costume...do you remember it? She doesn't fit in and so she wanders off until she finds the Bumble Bee people just like her. They come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They love her and she loves them and she is home. OK...so what? Well, I feel like a Bumble Bee. I seem to be feeling 'terminally unique' again. I feel like that Bumble Bee Girl. It is not a really comfortable feeling today. I thought I had found others like me, but they weren't and nor do they want to be. Mind you, I really do not blame them, and I am certainly not out to create clones of myself, (G-d Forbid). It is a little scary, I know, and uncomfortable to live the way we live. I dress differently then most, if not all the women in my community. (I have been told though I would fit in well in Tsfat, I look like a country girl or even a gypsy/hippie, lol). I homeschool my children. Financially we are definitely on the low end of the totem. Baruch HaShem though, He really does provide all our needs. We live simply. We have one car, although right now I am using my son's while he is Israel. I only use medicine when needed, relying on herbs, oils, homeopathy and other alternative healing methods. I believe in 'crazy' things like natural birth, homebirth, long term nursing, homemade baby food, cloth diapers,midwives and the list goes on... What does it all mean? I believe I have a message to give and live. I suppose it can get discouraging for any messenger when others do not actually embrace the message. There is a lot of fear involved. Heck, I understand fear intimately. Of course it is scary. I guess we all in our own way feel this 'uniqueness' sometimes. I suppose I am not so unique in that. Maybe I am supposed to just give the message and let people walk their own path. Novel thought, huh? (°Ü°) I am not ungrateful either. I am part of a whole tribe of people, I am so proud to be a Jew. I just think it would be nice to find a nuclear group of like minded people within the fold. I know they are out there, I've just not found them yet...or maybe they've not found me. :-)
Blind Melon No Rain Lyrics
All I can say is that my life is pretty plain I like watchin' the puddles gather rain And all I can do is just pour some tea for two And speak my point of view But it's not sane, It's not sane
I just want some one to say to me I'll always be there when you wake Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today So stay with me and I'll have it made
I am Lover of my Beloved, Imma to my three blessings, a dreamer of dreams and maker of my home. I have homeschooled now for about 13 years and it is our way of life. I am a preschool teacher, doula, childbirth advocate, Jill-of-all-trades, Mistress of none and aspire to someday become the local village Wise Woman.