Thursday, January 05, 2006

"I can't believe YOU are actually letting her go!"

Y'know, if another person says this to me, I may forgo my naturally nonviolent ways :::cough, cough::: and slug them!

OK, maybe not, but really it is beginning to get annoying. People who do not homeschool, who do not raise their children the way that we do, totally misunderstand why we do what we do. They seem to think that we kept them home, protected them, filtered things, etc., because we wanted them to stay lame at home for the rest of their lives. What a terrible thing I did by not having television and pop culture all over my home. Who would want such a thing for their children?

We homeschool because there was no other option as far as we were concerned. We were certainly not sacrificing our children to the public school system, (no offense intended to those who do use the schools, I know some are very fine and wonderful children have come out of them), but for us we could not. We did not want the schools enforcing their beliefs, their ideas of right and wrong, their agenda, etc., on our children.

We did not want our children to grow up peer dependent. We wanted to spare them the agonies as much as possible of this slavery that young people so often find themselves in. Slavery to the opinions of Hollywood and it's minions, slavery to pop culture, fads, fashions and the opinions of their equally confused peers. Did our children have to struggle with any of these issues? Of course they did! We did not raise them in a cave after all. They had friends and these things sometimes came up, but they were secure in themselves already and if they had any questions they came to us.

We presented them life in it's beauty and in it's ugliness. We did not keep all of it away, we could not, but we did shelter them from the worse and we allowed them to experience the rest when they were ready and through our filters. We have dysfunction in our family just like the rest of America so they could not be spared of all sorrow.

Some accused us of over protecting our children. Tell me who among you, if you had as your own the Hope Diamond would not 'over protect' it? I dare say our children are more valuable than this mere trinket. Besides that, as I said before, we did not live as hermits on a mountaintop, so life happened every day all around us.

'You are raising hot house plants', I was told. Yep, I thought, indeed I am. Strong plants, growing deep and strong roots, to withstand any storm when they are ready to be transplanted outside. This is the whole point. We raised them to be strong and independent in themselves. To know that family is where it is at. That if you do not have faith and family you have nothing. That no matter what and not matter who, your family is always there for you. That your best friends should be the ones waiting at home for you at the end of the day. If you cannot respect and be kind to your parents and siblings, how can you treat others any better? If you do treat friends kinder than siblings there is something very wrong. We tried to give them a solid foundation to launch from. A safe place to strengthen their wings from which they would fly. They grew stronger and more secure in themselves and in the safety of their home. And now that the time has come and they are ready, they will take flight! This is what it was all about. To enable and empower them to leave when they were ready and not before. Not at the magic age of 18 because society says so. Not because they heard us say, I can't wait till they are all eighteen and out of the house.

Some folks just don't get it. They think it is all about us controlling and suffocating them. Quite the contrary. We helped them to grow strong and helped refine their character and nature. They are strong in their faith and and trust the Holy One, Most Blessed be He.

Our children have not always agreed with us, but they have always respected. We have not always agreed with them, we have always loved them and given them the freedom to grow. In doing that we grew as parents too and as human beings. We are all constantly being refined. You cannot believe I am letting her go?! Why not? Of course I am, because as a dear friend just told me, this is the best of homeschooling! This is where it goes into action. This is where are the principles and faith and everything else that is homeschooling becomes very practical. When they leave the nest and soar with the eagles! This is beyond my wildest dreams and I am most blessed and very proud of the children that Hashem has given me! I pray I make my Father proud too.

But those whose hope is in Hashem will have renewed strength; they will grow wings like eagles; they will run and not grow tired, they will walk and not grow weary. ~~Isaiah40:31

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