Happenings in my side of the Universe

1. My beloved children both arrived safely in JFK airport on the 20th of June from Eretz Israel. It was such an amazing time of anticipation for their father and I. We were both so nervous (can you imagine?) and so excited about them getting back! As we were waiting for them to come out of customs, I wondered what they would look like, how they were going to do with reentry, how tired would they be, etc.? After waiting for what felt like hours and hours we finally saw them. They there were, Ya'akov my yeshiva bochur and Racheli radiating Tsfat, it was amazing! After my initially squeals, hugs and kisses, we started for our journey back to Philly. It was all so strange to them and ironically foreign. Their father asked if they were happy to be home and he was answered with dead silence from the back seat. I looked at him and laughed, "What kind of question is that? Ask if they are happy to see us?"
"Well, are you happy to see us?" He was quite relieved by the zealous "Yes!" that resounded from the back seat! So far they seem to be doing well, Ya'akov busy getting his learning seder set up and Racheli doing her best to recover from jet lag. She misses her friends very much so I am sure that adds to it. What are they going to do from here? Only Hashem knows for sure. They both want to return to Eretz Israel, and B'ezrat Hashem they will.

2. I am teaching ballet again! Yippee! It is so much fun to teach the little ones again. I taught many years ago and quite honestly figured those days were done. Well, thankfully I was wrong. It all started with one mommy asking if I knew anyone who taught ballet. I said, yes as a matter of fact I do, me! She was so pleased and we started talking about the possibilities of teaching dance to some girls. I am happy to say I have two classes now, pre-ballet and ballet 1!

3. Along with everything else I try to squeeze in to learn, I am busy trying to keep up with my doula skills. G-d willing, I will have a new mommy this month and I am so looking forward to attending this birth. This lady is a special friend of mine and it is an honor for me to have been chosen to be her doula. But, truth be told, being a doula is an incredible honor and privilege.

4. My little one that I care for is growing and talking by leaps and bounds! I do not have her as often now since mommy is a work at home mommy, when I do have her (about twice week now) she keeps me on my toes! She is a real snuggle bunny and quite generous with her hugs.:::sigh::: I really love my jobs!

5. For the past two weeks we have had a little one staying with us. What a delight he is, but as all young mothers know, what hard work! He is a very bright and busy fellow who is filled with the simcha of life! Thank G-d, I have help with my girls but along with the other day to day goings on, classes, shopping, and general happenings it makes for a full life for all.

Overheard in the rooms...

The hole in your soul was placed there by G-d to be filled by G-d.

Mazel Tov!

A big mazel tov to A Simple Jew and mishpocha on the birth of his new baby girl! Mommy and baby are both doing well B"H! May this new addition to klal Israel grow in Torah and mitzvot, and bring much nachat and simcha to her beloved family!

New Birth Book To Be Released June 6!

Yippee! A new birth book is due to be released this June 6! This one is titledCreating Your Birth Plan : The Definitive Guide to a Safe and Empowering Birth by Marsden Wagner, looks very promising. Many women are unaware what a birthplan is let alone how to create one. Birthplans empower a mother with what she wants for her and her baby's birth experience. She is not left in ignorance, to the whims and sometimes bullying of the medical staff. I look forward to adding this book to my birth bookshelf.

Doctors

when doctors told patients that there was no hope, he would criticize them harshly. "The Torah tells us," he would repeat, "that a doctor is given permission to heal. That is his expertise. When he gives a prognosis of doom, he has exceeded his authority."

We must understand that healing is in G-d's hands, and therefore is always possible. He is the absolute Master of our lives, and we cannot put any limits on what He can do.

The Soap Maven

The Soap Maven will be taking a short break while she recuperates from surgery scheduled for May 25th. She hopes to be off about 3 weeks if all goes as planned. During her convalescing, she will not be making soap. However, we do have a good supply of soap and other products on hand and Hannah & Rachel will be filling orders with available stock.
We do appreciate each and every one of you and Susan looks forward to being back in the swing of things and stirring the soap pot.


Please keep this very special lady and dear friend of mine in your prayers that all should go well with her upcoming surgery and that she should have a fast and full recovery. If you have never checked out her website, Dahlem's Soapworks, you really should. She has the most amazing soap and I have to tell you, it is all this family uses! This product right here, the Solid Lotion Bar, is an absolute fave of mine. No more dry heels or hands! It is fantastic and really portable. Go take a peek at all the goodies The Soap Maven has to offer!

Mother's Day

Every year my beloved family always plans something very special for me for Mother's Day. I am always surprised and I am always so blessed by the whole process. They pack a picnic lunch and off we go to whatever destination they have chosen, usually a beach and a lighthouse. This year with the older two away I wasn't sure what was going to be. I have to admit I was a little sad not having them here and I truly was not expecting much of anything. Well, they surprised me nonetheless with this lovely picture you see here handmade by my youngest Tzivya! I was speechless when I saw it...then she told me the story behind it. The blue and white lighthouse is the Jewish people shining the light of Torah and mitzvot. The ship is the S.S. Moshiach soon coming into port. I also saw the moon as the Jewish people constantly renewing themselves as the moon does and the night sky darkest before the dawn. And of course 'we are the sheep of His pasture.' I could not believe she actually had time to do this for me with our busy schedules.

They also bought me these two marvelous books I had been wanting for some time now."The Light and the Fire of the Baal Shem Tov" and "Through Fire and Water, the Life of Reb Noson"







CAPE MAY LIGHTHOUSE NJ
Afterwards we packed up our lunches and left for Cape May NJ! What a wonderful day it turned out to be! The ocean waves were dark green and crashing everywhere due to the full moon. The sky was grey and stormy. It was all so powerful and very high energy! We were there for some time and I felt renewed by it all. What started out as a blase day turned out to be such a precious gift from my family and Hashem, who always has such compassion on me.

The Empty Treasure Chest

This past Sunday the city of Brotherly Love held an Israeli Independence Day celebration. There were kiosks selling jewelry and Judaica, falafel and shwarma. There were camel rides and a moon bounce for the children. There was even a band and Israeli dancing. In spite of the festivity about me it all felt a little flat. What was wrong I wondered to myself? I saw friends I hadn’t seen in so long and to be with so many Jews and seeing so many have such a grand time, was beautiful. So, what was missing?

Torah! That was the key factor and that was what was missing. All the festivity and fun, Israeli flags and Jewish identity felt empty without the obvious presence of Torah. It seemed to me to be a most exquisite treasure chest of fine woodwork, sturdily made, strong and resilient, bound together to last several life times, but when opened was found to be empty.

I realized once again how deep and important a Jew’s connection to Torah is. In the book, Turbulent Souls by Stephen Dubner, he expresses this supernatural connection quite beautifully. In his story, he writes of his family who had converted to Catholicism and his return to his roots and to Judaism. He writes of his first time in a synagogue. How it all seemed so foreign and how much like an intruder he felt until the Holy Torah was brought out from the ark.

“… The service, though was baffling: standing, bowing, moaning, no one in unison, cloudbursts of Hebrew, as intelligible to me as a coughing fit,… What was I doing here?...I was utterly forlorn.
And then the Torah was brought out. Suddenly all the jabbering was reduced to an appreciative murmur. The air itself seemed to grow lighter, easier to breathe. The bulky Torah scroll, swaddled in its glittering cover like a child of royalty was… escorted down the aisle by an old man struggling happily beneath its weight… the men and boys up front hurried to greet it…I tumbled into a bone deep understanding. I too threw myself at the Torah, awkwardly scraping it with my fingers, lifting my fingers to my lips. A resonance, a gratefulness, a relief, blistered its way inside me…”

I too had my own ‘first time seeing the Torah’ experience. I remember it very well, being in a synagogue and the opening of the ark. Seeing all the Torah scrolls so beautifully adorned yet obviously well used. I remember how I cried realizing the enormity of it all and what these holy objects really were. The same Torah given to Moshe Rabbeinu, (Moses our Teacher), was right there in front of me.

The beauty of it all really is overwhelming but opening up its sacred words and allowing it to touch the very depths of us is even more beautiful. The change that the Torah can make on a person’s soul is the most incredible work of art there is. Recently at a class that my beloved and I attend, the Rabbi taught about how many will allow Hashem in their lives on the Holy Days or in times of trouble but will not keep him in the day to day. They may attend synagogue on Rosh Hashanah but they will not want G-d to come home with them. “OK G-d, this was great, but don’t you dare come home with me.” In other words you wait here, don’t call me, I’ll call you. Maybe they have all the accoutrements of a religious life, all of the outward appearances but lack the depth of a Torah life. They may have some holy books in their home, a Chumash (Five books of the Torah) or a Tanakh (the Bible) but they are just there sitting on the shelves. They are just lovely touches and adornments to the home. What would happen if they were opened and used? Not only would they adorn the home but their souls as well.

When the men lay tefillin on their arms they wrap the strap around their middle finger and hand and they say:
“I will betroth you to Me forever…” Hashem is declaring that Israel eternally remains His betrothed. At the class Rabbi said,” Imagine a couple getting engaged and the fellow saying to the girl, ’OK. We’re engaged but I don’t want you to come around and don’t dare ever call me…’ What kind of engagement that would be? A ring with no relationship? It would look nice but it wouldn’t last!

All of these situations are empty treasure chests, really lovely but nothing inside. We, all of us Jews need to be filled with the precious gems of Torah. We need to fill our individual treasure chests with love of Hashem, love of Torah and love of our fellow Jew. Then as a people we will be the most beautiful of treasure chests filled with the most valuable of precious gems, Torah filled lives.

And Now for Something Totally New!!

You MUST NEEDS check out this incredible new music coming straight from the Holy City of Tsfat! From out of the ancient and mystical Old City is a music that is as ecclectic and mystical as those who inhabit it's holy walls. This CD is truly healing and contemplative as well as joyful and spiritual. Spaced out and earthy, Kabbalah Dream Orchestra will lift your spirit high! A perfect mix of the old spiced with the new, niggunim with a twist. Check it out!

Something to think about…LITERALLY

Guard your thoughts carefully, for thought can literally create a living thing.

The higher a faculty, the further it can reach.
You can kick something with your foot, but throw it higher with your hand. You can reach still further with your voice, calling to a person very far away. Hearing reaches yet further, for you can hear sounds like gunfire from a very great distance. Your sight reaches even further, seeing things in the sky.
The higher the faculty, the further it can reach. And highest of all is the mind, which can penetrate the loftiest heights. You must therefore safeguard your mind above all else.

Rebbe Nachman of Breslov’s Wisdom #46

Shabbat in Tsfat:Trip to Israel part 4

“Ir ha madregot!” my son said as we schlepped all six bags of luggage up the seemingly never ending steps leading to my daughter’s apartment. “’City of steps’, you ain’t kidding.” I panted as I followed not so far behind. After a long three hour bus ride there still no immediate rest in site for me. No matter, I thought there will be time for that soon enough.

Tsfat is very quiet at night. It felt like we were the only ones there. I had never seen so many steps in my life. Every time I thought we had arrived at the top, there was another flight leading higher still. Finally we were there and got ourselves settled in. I fell into a completely contented sleep, happy to be with my children and happy to be in Israel. What could be better?

The next morning I woke at my usual early hour. I really thought I would have slept in but I felt no jet lag and was totally rested. I walked out onto the balcony of the apartment and there was a view of Mount Meron that was stunning! Bathed in billowy clouds it really took my breath away. We were so high in the mountains we sometimes looked down on the clouds. I was anxious to go explore and visit whatever there is to visit in Tsfat. Was I in for a treat!

Do you remember my blog about the “Bumble Bee People”? Well, family and friends I found them! They are all living on a beautiful mountain in an Old City with stones and stairs everywhere. Tsfat is like nothing I have ever seen or experienced in my life. I was totally home and at home. I have several friends in Tsfat and made many more. The beauty of it all is truly breathtaking.

Erev Shabbat was strange for me. Since I was not in my home and we had invitations for both meals there was nothing really for me to do. I felt somewhat off and useless not doing anything soI begged the girls to let me do something in the apartment. They seemed happy to have an Ima around and wanted me to feel like I was on vacation. Finally they let sweep and prepare the bathroom tissue; now I began to feel a little like I was at least preparing for Shabbat.

The girls and I got ourselves ready and we soon heard sirens going off. Earlier in the day there was a man driving around with a megaphone announcing candle lighting time and when the start of Shabbat was. Now with the sirens going off we knew Shabbat was soon here. “Sirens, guys!” yelled my daughter to the rest of her room mates. There was a mad scramble for last minute preparations and finally we were all gathered around the table to light the shabbat candles.

Since I was the mommy, the girls had me light first. After I said the bracha (blessing) I took such a breath in. My first Shabbat in Eretz Israel! How did this miracle happen? What could I say to my Abba now? How kind He is to me? How grateful I am for all He has done? Oy… I prayed for my beloved so far away and my children. I prayed for all my beloved friends who love me in spite of myself and asked HaKadosh Baruch Hu to please send us the Moshiach! I had to make this a good one since there was no interference at all with my prayers there!

Quite a few of the ladies in Tsfat attend shul on Friday nights and most of the girls do too. I was really excited about this as it was something I have always wanted to do but it is not the custom of the ladies back in my neighborhood to go Friday nights. That night we attended the Breslov shul. What can I say? It was truly an experience and not one to be missed. The tefilla there was highly intense. The ladies section was filled and downstairs by the men was packed! I was so excited. The tefilla was GORGEOUS and slow. I could not believe that I was actually able to pray with the kehilla. I was so used to my rushing and trying to keep up with the folks at home that I was going too fast for the congregation here! What a trip that was! Once I felt the rhythm I was able to just flow and enjoy. The men sang and danced after the services and it was such a joy to watch from the balcony. (I just love synagogues built like this, you can see everything and it is totally tznua::modest::)

After the service was done, we had dinner with friends of ours Moshe and Rochel. If you haven’t done, so please go visit my friends and their amazing website which is an absolute labor of love. He has so many articles and videos and shiurim there, you would stay quite busy for a very long time! I must tell you that this night was the first time we had actually met in person. I had been visiting Reb Moshe’s site for many years now and when I found I was going to be in Tsfat I knew I had to meet this special family. Like every other experience in Tsfat, our Friday night meal there was incredible. Rochel was a gentle and warm hostess who put us at ease immediately welcoming these four strangers into her home as if we were relatives she had not seen for a while. The Kiddush was beautiful, the meal was delicious and the torah we shared and that was given over was inspiring. We stayed until late, but it seemed we were there but minutes the time was so enjoyable.

Walking home I felt like I was on a cloud. Everything was so quiet the holiness permeated everything. There were no noises except for singing coming from some of the homes and some sounds of nature, utter kedusha. To be continued…

Number One Hundred

Here are one hundred roses for you! Why? Because this is post number 100! Wow, I cannot believe it! Thanks so much for all of your input and friendships I have made along the way. Here's to 100 more posts! Hopefully one of the next ones will be me telling you I am packing because Moshiach is here and we have a plane to catch! Of course, who will be reading or writing blogs then...we will all have so many more important things to do! Please Hashem may it be soon in our time!

First Conversation!

WOW! Can I tell you I am so amazed! My little one that I care for and I had our very first conversation the other day and it was AMAZING! She is only a little over a year old (BA"H)! How is that, you ask? Well, I'll tell ya'... Sign language! Yes, you read that correctly, sign language! For a while now I have been teaching her different signs for this word and that and she has picked them up all so well. Her mommy was quite pleased and it has made it so easy because she has been able to express thoughts for some time now. Words like 'more', 'eat', and 'no' were very easy for her to learn. She also knows 'please' and 'sleep'. Well, our first conversation went something like this.

Philly: lays baby for nap and strokes her head and signs “Baby sleep”.

Baby: signs "No, up"

Philly: signs "No, baby sleep now"

Baby: signs "No baby no sleep please up"

Philly: laughs and signs "Baby sleep please"

Baby: proceeds to sign most emphatically "PLEASE UP!"

OK, to me this was the coolest! She was able to put a sentence together and express a full thought! We actually dialogued and had a conversation!

You should know that this has in no way stunted her verbally because she repeats everything that she hears! She often speaks and signs at the same time, depending on what suits her. The other day she was signing as she was falling asleep, 'talking' in her sleep if you will.

I had used sign language with my own children also, but not until they were older. I just was looking for a way to talk to my children without speaking or worse yelling. It was just so nice to be able to sign across the room "Are you OK?" and my children respond, "No, I need to use the restroom!" No hollering, no embarrassment, just simple communication.

This is also effective with little ones since you do not want to be constantly be saying “no”. You just sign it.

Some good books to check out and start out with are Teaching Your Tot to Sign and Signing Made Easy.

Children really pick up the signs very easily and it is a nice way for you both to learn a second language.

There are also a ton of websites out there. Just Google "baby sign language" and have fun!

Blogging Blues

I have not abandoned you in the middle of my trip. There is just so much I want to write about that I need to get my thoughts better organized. There are so many people and things I want to share with you all. I wish you were just here with me, so I could pour you that hot cup of coffee, and we could just shmooze. You would have to listen to me blabber on about my trip and we could just sort it all out after we were done. I could interject, "Oh yeah and then there was..." and not have to cut, paste, delete make sure there is continuity in thought, proper punctuation, grammar etc. You would just get it, it would just be easier. You would see my face light up when I told you the awesome people I met and you would feel my homesickness as I tell you about how much I long to return. Not a day goes by that I do not think of my home. Rebbe Nachman said, "You are wherever your thoughts are. Make sure your thoughts are where you want to be." Well, my thoughts are ever in Eretz Israel. I have not yet gotten to a point were I do not get a bit emotional about it when I think of Tsfat. I am fighting hard to maintain all I learned and all I felt while there. I was told I would have to do that, and it is so true. But I tell you there is so much joy in the journey and if I did not have to fight then it would not be so real and so prominent in my thoughts as it is. So, bear with me. I will soon be posting more, it just may be in several parts. I do not like putting up such long posts, so I try to keep them short but sweet.

The Kotel and Off to Tsfat: Trip to Israel part 3

First stop was to the takana (bus station) to meet my daughter Racheli who was on her way to Jerusalem from Tsfat. Everything and everywhere had a strange dejavu feel to it. It was reality and yet there was dream like quality to all of it. I think the strangest feeling was how familiar it all seemed.
How could that be possible when I had never been there? And yet everywhere we went, from the very beginning seemed as if I seen it all, knew it all so intimately. Maybe it was echoes of a past life? Maybe it because my soul knew I belonged there? Or maybe it was because my heart was so ready for this trip and embraced everything as it was. I can’t really explain it, but from the moment the plane landed I knew I was home.
Racheli finally arrived and it was like another scene out of a movie. Lots of tears, hugs and kisses. We dropped off our baggage at Ya’akov’s yeshiva and caught the bus to the Kotel. It was a misty, cloudy day but it made no difference while we were there. What were a few drops of rain when we were at the very gate to the Throne Room of the King of the Universe.
When I first saw the Kotel I said to my children, “I thought it was bigger.” I immediately felt embarrassed after I said it, but they laughed knowingly and informed me everyone says that. Interestingly enough my initial perceived smallness of the Kotel changed immediately as I neared its holy stones. Right up to the Wall I slowly walked. I had no idea which way my children went, nor was I worried. I felt quite safe and alone, but not lonely. I had no fears except for the fear of the awesomeness of where I was. Even that I am sure I felt only to a small extent. To be sure, if I truly realized where I was how could I have even taken another step? I would have simply fallen on my face before Him and poured my heart out to my Abba. As I approached the Wall I wondered what would happen. Would I be changed?
“Oh, Please Hashem, don’t let me walk away from here the same!” I cried. I kissed and touched the massive stones, placed all the letters my beloved family and friends sent with me to place before the King and opened my book of tehillim. This sefer (book) would become my very best friend during this trip. I poured out my heart in utter gratitude for this precious gift Abba had given me. I then felt every emotion come forth from my heart. As the tears came forth I felt the release and relief of a soul set free. I cried and cried and a dear lady murmured “baruch Hashem,” over and over. She placed her hand on my shoulder and told me to be B’simcha, Moshiach is soon here! My heart rejoiced at this very thought. I begged for this joyful news to happen soon! I poured out my requests for my children, my beloved, myself and others. My heart was so full it was easy to pray. I could have stayed there for hours and I do not think it would have felt more than a few minutes.
Finally, after praying the Amidah, I felt able to walk away. Slowly, not turning my back from the Holy Wall, the last remnant of our last Holy Temple, I truly felt I was leaving a Holy and Royal place. I thought of the dear lady who told me to be b’shimcha, Moshiach is here, I prayed that it should be true. I imagined what it would be like here when the Holy Temple was rebuilt, may it be soon in our time.
I found my children all waiting for me and I pulled them so close to me. Here we were, all of us In Jerusalem! Hashem is so very good to us!
The children took me inside where we could get close to where they think the Kadosh Kadoshim (Holy of Holies) is. My son went to pray, and at this point I was too overwhelmed and exhausted. I gazed down from the ezrat nashim (ladies section) and sighed.
It was getting late, so we caught a cab to the bus station and left for Tsfat. We had a three hour ride ahead of us. I thought now I would finally be able to get some sleep. I hadn’t slept much the night before we left, nothing to speak of on the flight and now we were into the next day. Oddly enough, I did not feel tired or jet lagged but I for sure knew I had better get some sleep.

Some thoughts on Repentance

These are some quotes from Rebbe Nachman’s ‘Sefer Ha-Middot’ ‘The Aleph Bet Book’
May they be a help to myself and all of us to come to true teshuvah and to come closer to Hashem the Merciful and Compassionate One.

When a person is humble, it is as if he offered all the different sacrifices.

Anyone who confesses his sin has a share in the World to Come.

When a person cries at night, his voice is heard and the stars and constellations cry with him.

Sin saps a person’s strength.

When a person feels remorse for having commited a sin, he is forgiven for all his sins.

When one sighs he becomes a new person.

For repenting wholeheartedly, the Holy One gives a person a “heart” through which he can truly know him.

When a person confesses, G-d loves him benevolently and removes His anger from him.

When a person is embarrassed by his sins, G-d deals charitably with him.

When you want to repent, ask the Tzaddik to bring you before G-d.

Sins are atoned through loving kindness and truth.

By asking G-d for His love, He will cover over your transgressions.

The best way to rectify the negative effects of one’s sins is through humility.

By crying out your prayers, G-d will forgive you.

G-d is appeased by a person’s confession, which is like his having built an altar and brought a sacrifice.

Airport Adventures: Trip to Israel Part 2

The airline wanted you there three hours before your flight left and on top of that there was a two hour drive to get to JFK airport, that is of course as long as there was no traffic. This meant it was going to be an all day affair. We didn’t care how long it would take as long as we got there safely. Once the car was packed, instructions for the dog and cat’s care left and goodbyes said, we were off. We prayed for safety, said tefilla ha derech (wayfarer’s prayer) and asked that there would be no traffic. Our requests were happily granted and we made it to the airport in amazing time! So much so we were actually the first people there! We laughed when we saw this and thanked Hashem for this kindness. We decided to eat our lunches to pass the time. Finally we were able to get in line and check in our luggage. We were so excited and nervous. We answered the first questions, put the baggage through x-ray and waited in line for our boarding passes. Wow, we were going to be done in no time. We chatted and we waited, and chatted and waited some more. Hmmm….this seems to be taking a bit long. After a bit the staff informed us that the computers were down, they were working as fast as they could to fix them and to please be patient. “Baruch Hashem”, I said. “This is all good.” I was determined to not let anything bring me down. Hashem had brought us this far, we just had to wait a bit and be patient. After waiting for quite some time the powers that be, finally decided they were going to have to do everything by hand. They did not want to make us wait any longer and they needed to get us moving. I have to tell you how amazing the El-Al staff really was. They were very professional and courteous. They got us through as quickly as possible and with hand written boarding passes in hand, we were on our way. After we finally boarded the plane, we had to wait longer, still because of the computers being down. Our flight that was supposed to leave at 4:55 finally departed at 7 PM.
For both of us this was our first time to Israel but for my youngest it was her first time leaving the country, (mine being when I went to Canada at fifteen if that counts at all) and her first airplane flight ever. It was a huge deal for us! Any nervousness she had she handled quite well. It was a smooth flight for the most part and although it was very long and the movies were nothing we were interested in, we were just happy to finally be on our way.
I can’t tell you how safe I felt on this plane filled with other Jews! It was really so neat for me, seeing everyone and all different flavors. When morning came and the men started their prayers, laying tefillin etc, I felt especially blessed. How beautiful it all was and how wonderful we were all going home, even if only for a visit.
The plane was soon coming into Ben Gurion airport and I had my first glimpses of Eretz Israel! I was beside myself with joy! There it was, Tel-Aviv! We were coming in for a landing and there it was! “Oh, Hashem how good you are to us! How kind You are to allow us to come to this Holy Land!” My heart sang out! I began to cry and cry. We were actually here!
To my daughter and me, this was the most beautiful airport on the planet in the most beautiful place in the planet. Everything was wonderful; from the free push carts, (which JFK charges three dollars for) and mezzuzot on all the doorways, to the Hebrew announcements and writing on the signs. We were ecstatic! We got our luggage, (thank You G-d nothing was lost) and anxiously proceeded towards the area where my son would be waiting for us. I began scanning the crowd eager to see my beloved son, who I hadn’t laid eyes on since the beginning of September. This was the longest I had been separated from any of my children. I saw someone waving at me and began to run, cart, luggage and all, toward my son’s direction. I was so excited that before I finally got to him I proceeded to run over another young man’s foot and spill my luggage all over the floor. “Slicha, slicha!” I said. (slicha means ‘excuse me’ in Hebrew and I became quite proficient at this phrase by the time I left Israel.) My son and I embraced and as you can well imagine by now I cried some more. We gathered up our strewn luggage got on a shuttle started on our way to Jerusalem, to meet Racheli and to visit the Kotel. This was the first place I needed to go before continuing on to Tsfat where we would be staying the first half of our trip.

For the LOVE of coffee

OK, I confess to you all, for all my natural and health food inclinations, I have never been totally able to rid myself of coffee. Quite frankly because I dun-want-to. I love coffee! It is the drink of royalty! (well, at least in my small part of the universe) I love the way it smells, I love the bitter taste. I like it black and I love it the way my grandparents made it...very European, espresso with lots o'scalded milk and sugar. :::sigh::: (I think they call them lattes now) I loved coffee before 'Starbucks' was around. (You do not want to hear my opinion on these so called coffee houses and what they claim to sell as coffee). I gotta tell you, coffee in Israel, now was awesome! That was coffee! When you get there be sure to check out Mordechai's little place in Tsfat and the 'Cream and Dream' on Ben Yehuda Street in Yerushalayim.

I have had to cut down ALOT, don't drink near as much as I used to. I used to be a pot a day, now I just a enjoy a small cup or two in the morning with my beloved. AS much as I adore coffee, my tummy does not share my affections. So, we have come to a compromise. Ah well, a little is better than none.
Anyway, here is to all of us coffee drinkers, especially those of us who have had to switch to decaf chai during the day. It's not so bad...not really.

COFFEE: Do stupid things faster and with more energy!

For sure coffee drinkers can laugh at themselves...and quite maniacally too!

Actually Going! Trip to Israel Part 1

I was at a girlfriend’s house when I received the phone call. Everything went through and the trip to Israel was in the first stages. I put the phone down in amazement. Was this going to actually happen, really happen? My friend came out from her bedroom into the kitchen where I was.
“So, Philly, what’s happening? Did it go through?” she asked.
I was so dumbfounded.
“Yes”, I answered half in a daze.
“Oh, my goodness! I am so happy for you!” She squealed as she grabbed me a squeezed me so hard.
Typical for me, I began to cry and laugh at the same time.
“Baruch Hashem!” I cried. It was all I could say and it seemed that was all that there was to say.
Being good chasiditehs we began to twirl around the kitchen screaming and singing with absolute joy!
The reality of it all really had not sunk in. It all seemed to be happening so fast. Could Abba be really answering my prayers? Why in the world was I so shocked anyway? All I knew was a couple of days prior I had been told I needed to be in Israel with the children for Pesach. I replied in full agreement that it was a wonderful idea. But Hashem was going to have to do that. Little did I know how well He was going to do it. Within a couple of weeks I had finances out of the blue and the tickets ordered for both my youngest and I. It did not suit for my beloved to join us because of work issues and strangely enough all the finances that were provided were for just the two of us.
After my initial elation I began to plan. We did not have passports, household issues had to be in order, my beloved had to be taken care of, etc. Thankfully everything seemed to fall right into place. As I knew that this whole trip was planned and executed by the Almighty One, I stepped very cautiously. I felt like each step I took was on holy ground so I did not do a whole lot of talking about the trip, not even to my family. In fact the only ones who knew anything were those few people who were helping me in the planning. When I finally told my oldest daughter about the trip she cried with such relief. She had been so terribly homesick and was begging Hashem herself to send me to Israel to comfort her and ease her time! Truly Abba is the Compassionate One.
I have to admit that in spite of the obvious miracle this was, I was a still a little afraid it would not actually happen. I certainly did not want to provoke ayin hara :::poo, poo, poo::: so I didn't talk too much about it and when I did I was careful to always say, "b'ezrat Hashem". I was also reminded that Rebbe Nachman teaches there are MANY obstacles to getting to the Holy Land, so that also provoked me to much prayer. As each thing did come to fruition, (i.e. tickets and passports arriving, getting the luggage together, packing) and the day getting closer I began to pray even harder and speak a little more about it. I had to after all, there were sederim and meals to arrange for my beloved. I certainly could not leave him starving here! My community was amazing and once people knew I was going there were offers everywhere. I had to even set up a little itinerary for him to let him know whose home he was going to when. I also had to get my house ready for Pesach and shop before I left since my beloved was going to be here and we would be returning to the US for the last days of the holiday.
Finally, with everything all together and arranged, house pesachdik, meals done, my daughter and I packed and with passports and tickets in hand left with another friend to JFK airport.

Israel Prologue

I would like to start my journey from the very beginning. How it all came together is truly amazing! I won’t get into too many details really. I do want to tell you and make sure you know that is was a FOR REAL miracle! You should also know that if your dream is to go to Eretz Israel, beg Hashem, beg Him and see if He does not have rachmanit on you too and send you. Do not say, ‘I don’t have the time or money’, those are minor details for the King. Don’t worry about how it will all happen. Just pray and walk through the doors as they open. Do what you can and watch for the miracle to occur. That is how it came about for me. I wanted so badly to go, all my life this has been my dream. But that is all I thought it would ever be, a dream that would probably not come true until Moshiach came, (may it be speedily in our day!) But after Racheli left I began to pour my heart out in prayer. I prayed and I prayed and I prayed, “Please Hashem only YOU can send me to Eretz Israel…please Abba let me go!” You see, I could never have gone with out my children. I would have felt badly experiencing all that kaddusha without them. So Hashem allowed them to merit to go before me, and then in His mercy, my youngest and I merited to join them. I will forever be grateful to the Holy One, most blessed be He, for allowing us this privilege, may it be repeated again soon.

I'm back...did you miss me?

Shalom everyone!
I am back in the US from my most amazing time in Eretz Israel. There is so much I want to share with you and so much I am still digesting from my all too short time there. It will probably take me several entries to write it all, so try to be patient with me.
First to let you know, my children, B"H, are well and have grown so much during their time in Israel! I have to tell you, I was particularly nervous about seeing my son because I know that he has grown so much spiritually. I just wasn't sure how it would be...I am not sure exactly how to explain it. Part of me was worried I wouldn't be able to talk to him, share with him...y’know, the whole phenomenon of the young people 'flippin' out' in yeshiva/seminary. Well, my worries were for not, B"H! He was a true tzaddik! Every word that came from his mouth was Torah to share with me, and still my beloved son, showing me the same respect and love he always has. The same goes for my daughter...ay, what can I say, B"H, may they continue to grow from strength to strength.

MATISYAHU YOUTH!

OH WOW! Ok, so I admit I bought this CD thinking I would check it out and pass it on to my daughter. She just loves Matisyahu but I gotta tell you, it ain't happening! I have to get here her own copy now! I am loving this CD! I liked Matisyahu's live at Stubb's CD well enough especially 'King without a Crown'. But the whole CD was not my total cup of tea. But this new album really has something so much more to it. The lyrics, music, everything is just on another level. He has obviously grown in many ways, it shows. Track 3 'Time of your Song' is my absolute fave! The whole CD is just amazing. Check it out, and buy an extra copy for your young people!


I'm the arrow, you're my bow, shoot me forth and I will go
And I know and I go and I go get up and go
Make me feel its for real tell me what you know.

Look, up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! No it's airborne chometz! Who will save us from this plague? Rest easy Yidden, disguised as the average balabusta is none other than the scourge of chometz, Matza Woman! Yes, Matza Woman, stronger than a piece of furniture, faster than a speeding toddler, able leap tall piles of laundry in a single bound! Known by many aliases, Imma, mommy, mom, ma', honey, sister, best friend, she is in a neighborhood near you searching for chometz. In fact, you probably know her. hmmm.... maybe she is you. ;-)

Lehitraot!

Well, friends, family and misc. kind folks who read my blog, I am outta here! G-d willing my youngest and I are now safely on our journey to Eretz Israel to go home for Pesach and visit my beloved children, her siblings. This is my very first trip there and I cannot even tell you all the feelings that I am having. How does one react and feel when you go home? When you have never been there but you know you belong? I cannot wait to touch the Wall...I am told the Shechinah is there. My children tell me it is an experience like no other. :::sigh::: I cannot imagine, I really cannot. I can tell you this is a dream I have had my whole life. Oy...Abba is very kind indeed. B'ezrat Hashem (With G-d's help) We will be staying a week in Tsfat and then the second week in Yerushalayim (Jerusalem). That is where we will be celebrating the seders, G-d willing. I will try to email you while I am there, and take lots of pics. ( I have been threatened I will have you know, if I do not take lots o' pics.)
OK, gotta sign off here! Have a happy and kosher Pesach! B'ezrat Hashem, I will chat with you soon!

Midwives and Mothers

"It's not just the making of babies, but the making of mothers that midwives see as the miracle of birth."

-- Barbara Katz Rothman, Sociologist, Author of The Tentative Pregnancy, Genetic Maps and Human Imaginations and other books.

The doctor of the future

"The doctor of the future will give no medicine, but will interest his patient in the care of the human frame, in diet and in the cause and prevention of disease."
-Thomas Edison

Ultrasound in Pregnancy

While doing some research for a friend of mine concerning her pregnancy I came across this article from Midwifery Today. I do not think many mommies are aware of these issues with routine ultrasounds. As always is is about educating ourselves to make wise and informed decisions.



Ultrasound in Pregnancy
Ultrasound: high-frequency sound waves that travel at 10 to 20 million cycles per second. The pattern of echo waves creates a picture of tissue and bone.

In 1987, UK radiologist H.D. Meire, who had been performing pregnancy scans for 20 years, commented, "The casual observer might be forgiven for wondering why the medical profession is now involved in the wholesale examination of pregnant patients with machines emanating vastly different powers of energy which is not proven to be harmless to obtain information which is not proven to be of any clinical value by operators who are not certified as competent to perform the operations" (1).

Routine prenatal ultrasound (RPU) actually detects only between 17 and 85 percent of the 1 in 50 babies who have major abnormalities at birth (2,3).

RPU can identify a low-lying placenta (placenta previa). However, 19 of 20 women who have placenta previa detected on an early scan will be needlessly worried: the placenta will effectively move up without causing problems at the birth. Furthermore, detection of placenta previa by RPU has not been found to be safer than detection in labor (4).

The American College of Obstetricians has concluded that "in a population of women with low-risk pregnancies, neither a reduction in perinatal morbidity and mortality nor a lower rate of unnecessary interventions can be expected from routine diagnostic ultrasound. Thus ultrasound should be performed for specific indications in low-risk pregnancy (5).

Effects of ultrasound include cavitation, a process wherein the small pockets of gas that exist within mammalian tissue vibrate and then collapse. In this situation "...temperatures of many thousands of degrees Celsius in the gas create a wide range of chemical products, some of which are potentially toxic. These violent processes may be produced by microsecond pulses of the kind which are used in medical diagnosis." (American Institute of Ultrasound Medicine Bioeffects Report 1988). The significance of cavitation in human tissue is unknown.

Studies have suggested that these effects are of real concern in living tissues:

Cell abnormalities caused by exposure to ultrasound were seen to persist for several generations (6).
In newborn rats (similar stage of development as human fetuses at four to five months in utero), ultrasound can damage the myelin that covers nerves (7).
Exposing mice to dosages typical of obstetric ultrasound cased a 22% reduction in the rate of cell division and doubling of the rate of aptosis (programmed cell death), in the cells of the small intestine (8).
Two long-term randomized controlled trials comparing exposed and unexposed childrens' development at eight to nine years old found no measurable effect from ultrasound. However, the authors comment that intensities used today are many times higher than there were in 1979 and 1981 (9).
— Excerpted from "Ultrasound Scans: Cause for Concern,"
by Sarah Buckley, MD, Midwifery Today Issue 64, also published in Nexux, Oct–Nov 2002

Excerpt references:

Meire, HB (1987). "The Safety of Diagnostic Ultrasound," British J of Ob Gyn 94: 1121–22.
Ewigman, BG et al. (1993). "Effect of Prenatal Ultrasound Screening on Perinatal Outcome: RADIUS Study Group," New Eng J Med 329(12): 821–7.
Luck, CA (1992). "Value of Routine Ultrasound Scanning at 19 Weeks: a Four-Year Study of 8849 Deliveries," Brit Med J 34(6840): 1474–8.
Saari-Kemppainen, A., et al. (1990). "Ultrasound Screening and Perinatal Mortality: Controlled Trial of Systematic One-Stage Screening in Pregnancy. The Helsinki Ultrasound Trial," Lancet 336(8712): 387–89.
American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) (August 1997). Practice Patterns: Evidence-Based Guidelines for Clinical Issues in Obstetrics and Gynecology. "Routine Ultrasound in Low-Risk Pregnancy." No. 5.
Liebeskind, D. et al. (1979). "Diagnostic Ultrasound: Effects on the DNAS and Growth Patterns of Animal Cells," Radiology 131(1): 177–84.
Ellisman, MH et al.,(1987). "Diagnostic Levels of Ultrasound May disrupt Myelination," Exper Neur 98(1): 78–92.
Brennan P et al. (1999). "Shadow of Doubt," New Scientist 12:23.
Salvesen KA et al. (1999). "Ultrasound in Pregnancy and Subsequent Childhood Non-Right-Handedness: A Meta-Analysis," Ultrasound Obstet Gyn 13(4): 241–6.

Close to G-d by Philly Farmgirl

Oh the glorious mountains!
Peaks majestic, proudly standing
The air is sweet and pure
The sun shines so brightly, brighter
And I can see so clearly
Looking upward, in the clouds
I am close to G-d

Oh, the depths of the valley,
Lower, sinking, deeper shrinking
The air is thick and damp
Darkness abides, darker still
And I strain to see, but cannot
Looking upward toward the clouds
I am closer to G-d

The Adventures of Philly Farmgirl

As we see our heroine today we find her walking aimlessly and dazed about her house searching for her motivation.


OY! OY!

let's add a big heaving sigh to that::::SIGH:::

OK, that's better.

:::SIGH:::Oyyyyyyyyyy.

So what's with the oying and sighing Philly?

:::big dramatic orchestra music in the background:::

DAA DAA DUM!

Pesach cleaning!

Now where did I put my motivation?

It was just here yesterday, and lots of it!

...lotta good that did me on Shabbat.

Here, motivation, motivation, motivation. pss...pss...pss...oh great, here comes the cat!

:::wonders what cat food is kosher for pesach this year?::::

OK. Let's try the mantra.

DEEP BREATH

dust is not chometz...
dust is not chometz...
dust is not chometz...
chometz is dust...oops I mean,
dust is not chometz
and my beloved is not the korban pesach...

OK, I can do this!


Philly Farmgirl finds her motivation and plays really loud Simply Tsfat CD to keep moving.

Tune in next week to see how far she actually gets.

Supermarket Discussions

Anyone who knows me knows I love to talk about birth. I am a doula after all and it is my job to empower women to believe in themselves and how Hashem has created them. I am so about them knowing the strength that lies within. One of my other favorite topics is Moshiach. Well, today I was in the grocery store and met up with one of the incredible ladies that lives in my neighborhood. After greeting each other we almost immediately started to speak of things spiritual and began talking of Moshiach! Right there near the frozen gefilte fish we encouraged each other and spoke of the times we are in. We spoke of the 'birth pangs' of Moshiach. It seems there are many of us women in the community here talking about this very thing. So many of us are in great anticipation. It is like something has shifted and we feel it.
After all it is we women who know when the baby is coming. We see and feel all the signs. We feel the baby drop in our wombs and feel the increase in contractions. We feel the baby's activity quiet down right before labor and ours intensify as we go into a flurry of activity when we get our nesting urges. When the actual labor starts we are not totally shocked as we knew and felt the time was coming. We felt it and we prepared for it. Well, ladies, I think we are in beginning labor. I believe it is time to prepare. If we are indeed feeling the birth pangs of Moshiach than we need to be ready. We need to do teshuvah, increase in our tefilla, and to draw closer to Hashem. We need to encourage those around us, our beloved husbands, children, family and friends. We also need to encourage ourselves. Labor and delivery are not easy but they are possible and we can do it. This is an exciting time and as it was before so again now may it be in the merit of the righteous women's that we are redeemed from galut. May we have such emunah in our Father that we actively anticipate it.

I am getting my tambourine ready, how about yours?

Just a ramble from a big sister

The sun is shining so brightly today and it is turning my thoughts to spring. I miss spring terribly, much like I miss my brother and my sisters when I do not get to see them. Spring makes me feel happy and feel like myself. Seeing the new birth and peeping flowers reminds me of my beloved nieces and nephews, growing up and discovering new things.
This past Sunday I was able to spend time with my siblings and their brood. I have to tell you, I am just nuts about my sibs! I have two sisters and one brother and I just love them to death. They are some of my fave people. My sisters are two of the most beautiful women I know and my brother...:::sigh::: what an awesome guy! My brother's wife and my youngest sister are both expecting again. It is so much fun for me to visit with them and their children. At some points it made me a bit wistful, missing my own older two so much, (thank G-d I still have one at home!) but it is really wonderful to be a "Tity."
Now in spite of all the joy I felt, I ended up having to fight my own very opinionated self and bite my tongue. It was so hard when I saw my sibs making some decisions I either thought or know are wrong. I felt somewhat frustrated and sad at the same time. I wanted to say, "hey, why don't you try it this way!" or "no, honey you don't want to go there, remember what happened to me." I am the oldest after all and of course I feel like I must fix it, warn them, and teach them all about life, marriage and child rearing. :::sigh:::
They know me and they have seen my children grow. For the most part they think it is great, other than the "That's just big sis, Y'know she's the religious one." Don't get me wrong they are very respectful of me, but it just isn't their thing...yet. Example goes a long way. You never know who you affect by the way you live. Hopefully they will learn from the good I do and also from unfortunately the many mistakes I have made along the way.
I just want them to be happy and I want so much to spare them from any heartache. What can an oldest sister do? Threatening their lives and to tell mommy just doesn't seem to work any more. So what do I do? I use my main weapon! According to Rebbe Nachman, "Prayer is the Jew's main weapon." (Advice pg.275) So I will pray. I will pray for their relationships and their jobs. I will pray for their children and their homes. I will pray they will have good health and all that they need spiritually, physically, emotionally and financially. I will pray they come closer to G-d and find rest there. But mostly I will pray that I am a loving and kind big sister, and that I am worthy of my incredible brother and sisters.

LOOK WHAT I FOUND!

I just found this site and it looks like just the thing many of us ladies have all been longing for! I have been checking it out over my morning coffee and what a blessing it has been. When the children go down for thier nap go take a peek. Oh, but don't forget to come back and visit me too! The tea will be waiting...or the coffee if it is before 7 AM.

Beautiful example of REALLY trying to be b'simcha

I know many of us have struggles in our lives. We all have a level of pain that sometimes truly feels unbearable. Through it all we try to be b'simcha, to find the happiness and joy that we know somehow exists within the depths. This is no easy task. If you need encouragement check out this beautiful post from Shalom Bayit. You will find what to be joyful over as you visit with this dear single mom and read her heart's cry.

Here's to joy in the journey!

To Encourage us to Dance!

The Miriam the prophetess, Aaron's sister took a timbrel in her hand, and all the women went out after her in dance with timbrels. And Miriam chanted for them: Sing to the Lord, for He has triumphed gloriously/Horse and Driver He has hurled into the sea.
Shemot 15:20-21


Sarah was often ill. (Rebbe Nachman’s daughter) Her suffering deeply pained the Rebbe, who often spoke of it. Once the Rebbe came to visit, and found her greatly distressed by a toothache. “Even if it is difficult, you must force yourself to be happy,” the Rebbe told her. Then he explained that by vividly imagining being joyous, she could come to experience true joy -- so much so that she would wish to dance. Through this, she would be cured. Sarah took her father's advice to heart. Closing the shutters of her house, she began to dance. Before long, the pain had disappeared (Until the Moshiach, p. 334).



By moving about or dancing, you can awaken feelings of happiness inside yourself.
~~~Rebbe Nachman m’Breslov


The righteous women who left Egypt were so confident that G-d would perform miracles, that they took tambourines into the desert. So, too, with the final Redemption, the righteous women must -- and certainly do -- trust so completely in the imminent Redemption, that they will begin immediately in the last moments of exile, to play music and dance for the Redemption.
(The Lubavitcher Rebbe, 13 Shvat, 5752-1992)



It was the woman who accepted the Torah first at Mount Sinai, and, it was the womans heroic efforts in Egypt that ignited our deliverance. And once again, it will be the woman's song and dance that will lead us into the swing of Moshiach. (http://www.foreveryjew.com/women/nidah/index.htm)

Giving children something to hold onto

One of the nicest things about having children in seminary/yeshiva is that they share with me the Torah and life lessons they have learned there. It is such a bracha to listen to them give over all the precious jewels of truth that they have discovered. This is one of the treasures my daughter most recently shared with me. During a class the teacher spoke of the saying, "holding on to (or hiding) behind their mother's skirt." The teacher pointed out that as time has gone by and fashions changed there was less and less for the children to hold on to or hide behind.
We all realize that fashions have changed. Hemlines on ladies skirts and dresses have been down to the floor and back up again. Depending of the whims of designers and what society deems acceptable the skirts have gone from maxi to micromini. But have we ever thought about how this has affected our children?
I am reminded of shopping with my three little ones. There we were in any given store traipsing up and down the aisles looking for this or that, children cling to my skirt. This is how I trained them to shop with me. Sometimes I even had all three connected to my skirt, depending on whether or not there was a shopping cart for the youngest to ride in. The shopping had to be done and I could not always hold their hands. I did not allow them to walk away from me so holding on to my skirt was our only option.
There were also times when we would go somewhere new and unfamiliar. Although my children for the most part were very outgoing, I remember occasionally feeling a gentle tug at my skirt. I would look down into one of my children's wondering eyes peeking from behind their security blanket, my skirt. I would stroke their hair and smile at them, assuring them we were all just fine.
Rebbe Nachman teaches that, "The clothing a person wears is indicative of his character." (Alef Bet book pg.40) What I wear as queen of my home and a daughter of the King, shows who I am. It also gives my children something to hold on to. A tradition of faith and stability. A tradition of loving and respecting myself. I teach my daughters and my son how a lady looks. Now, I realize that it doesn't end there. Modesty goes far beyond keeping myself lovely, respectable and covered. It all starts in my heart and if that is the case than all the more so I need to strive for this modesty.
It truly is up to us, dear ladies. We are the ones who are the hearts of our homes. We are the ones who give the love of Judaism to our children and we are the ones who must give our beloved children something to hold on to, so they can be secure in this world.
I miss feeling that slight drag on my skirt knowing they were right there with me. B'ezrat Hashem, I have given them more. Something stronger than my skirt, and more stable than fluctuating hemlines. I pray the something that I have given them to always hold on to is Hashem and his Holy Torah.

A love song to Abba

By Philly Farmgirl


Knowing with my whole heart that You are really there
Feeling in my deepest soul that You truly care
Although everything around me is blowing out of control
I hold on to Your words to calm my restless soul

You are the Beloved
My only truth and hope
You are my safety
My only way to cope

Provider of all my needs, guiding me through each day
Giving me the strength to move, keeping me on this way
I know You want what is best for me, and all You do for my good
I place my simple trust in You as I know I should

I know that You Love me
I know that You Care
I know that You are Compassion
I know that You are there

2,000-Year-Old Judean Date Seed Growing Successfully

by Ezra HaLevi


A 2,000-year-old date seed planted last Tu B’Shvat has sprouted and is over a foot tall. Being grown at Kibbutz Ketura in the Arava, it is the oldest seed to ever produce a viable young sapling.


The Judean date seed was found, together with a large number of other seeds, during archaeological excavations carried out close to Massada near the southern end of the Dead Sea. Massada was the last Jewish stronghold following the Roman destruction of the Holy Temple over 1,930 years ago. The age of the seeds was determined using carbon dating, but has a margin of error of 50 years – placing them either right before or right after the Massada revolt.

The seeds sat in storage for thirty years until Elain Solowey of the Arava Institute for Environmental Studies was asked to attempt to cultivate three of them. Solowey spoke with Israel National Radio's Yishai Fleisher and Alex Traiman about reviving the ancient date palm.

Solowey, who raised the plant, has grown over 100 rare and almost extinct species of plants. Together with Hadassah Hospital’s Natural Medicine Center, she seeks to use the plants listed in ancient remedies to seek effective uses for modern medical conditions. The Judean date has been credited with helping fight cancer, malaria and toothaches. Solowey was skeptical about the chances of success at first, but gave it a try. “I treated it in warm water and used growth hormones and an enzymatic fertilizer extracted from seaweed in order to supplement the food normally present in a seed,” she said.

As this year’s Tu B’Shvat (the Jewish new year for trees, the 15th of the Jewish month of Shvat) approaches, the young tree that sprouted from one of the three seeds now has five leaves (one was removed for scientific testing) and is 14 inches tall. Solowey has named it Metushelah (Methuselah), after the 969-year-old grandfather of Noah, the oldest human being ever.

Solowey said that although the plant’s leaves were pale at first, the young tree now looks “perfectly normal.”

The Judean palms once grew throughout the Jordan Valley, from Lake Kinneret (the Sea of Galilee) to the Dead Sea. Those from Jericho, at the northern end of the Dead Sea, were of particularly notable quality. Though dates are still grown widely in the Jordan Valley, the trees come mostly from California.

The Judean date palm trees are referred to in Psalm 92 (“The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree…”). The tree was also depicted on the ancient Jewish shekel and now appears on the modern Israeli 10-shekel coin.

It is too early to tell, but if the tree is female, it is supposed to bear fruit by 2010, after which it can be propagated to revive the Judean date palm species altogether. “It is a long road to our being able to eat the Judean date once again,” Solowey said, “but there is the possibility of restoring the date to the modern world.”

THE ABOVE WAS PASSED ON TO ME BY A FRIEND, THANKS MIRIAM!

The blessing of a two block walk

So many of us ladies want to have that quiet time, that time alone with Hashem. But with the reality of life, family, husbands, children, home, jobs outside the home, etc., not many of us have this precious time. I have come to find myself taking advantage of my 2 1/2 block walk to my little one I care for to chat with Hashem. Everyday I walk these 2 1/2 blocks about four times. Every time Hashem and I have a little chat. There is a stop light there, so I have a little more time than it would actually take. I know you may be thinking this is not much, but it is like gold to me. I am a woman after all so you would be surprised what all I get said in that time.
I do have some other spaces in my day, but they are sporadic as the day goes. I have really become accustomed to this particular time. In those couple of minutes I pour out my heart to Hashem about my family, my children, my beloved and his work. I ask for wisdom and that I should be a good wife, mother, friend, sister, etc. Sometimes I just look up and tell Abba I love Him.
You may also have some moments in your day that you could spend in conversation with Hashem. You may just not be aware of them. Keep an eye out for minutes to pour your heart out. I know it would be wonderful to have that hour with Hashem in hisbodetut, and I am certainly not discouraging any of you ladies from 'going for it,' but sometimes we can get discouraged when we cannot set aside a large amount of time for this. Instead of feeling discouraged because it seems an impossibility in our busy schedules let's take hold of the minutes given to us. For sure it is time well spent, no matter how small. You'll be amazed!

Quotes Especially for Ladies

Here are some quotes I found from Rebbe Nachman (The Alef Bet Book) that I thought would especially encourage us ladies:

Lighting the Sabbath candles promotes peace.

Teaching schoolchildren brings about an increase in tranquility.

A modest woman is rewarded with good children.

A person who has trust in G-d fears nothing.

Trust in G-d brings peace.

Words spoke calmly are accepted by those for whom they are intended.

By moving about or dancing, you can awaken feelings of happiness inside yourself.

Whatever you need -- big or small -- pray for it.

Did you ever wonder if someone needed your stuff?

Check out FREECYCLE.org! I just found out about this spot and it looks great. It is a way to give away things you just aren't using or need anymore. It is also a place to maybe find an item you need but can't afford to buy right now. All items are given away and you can find things in your local area. You place an ad and they e-mail you to receive it and you can place an ad for things that you need and someone who has them can e-mail to give them to you free of charge. What a nice idea don't you think?

SIMPLY TSFAT!

If you have never had the joy of seeing Simply Tsfat in concert you are truly missing an incredible experience! We had the privilege of having them here in the City of Brotherly Love last night and I cannot express to you the simcha and inspiration that these three men brought to our community. Thanks to the efforts of Chelkienu everyone there at the concert clapped and rejoiced in being the children of the King. Not only did we enjoy their energetic and inspiring music we also heard a wonderfully entertaining version of Rebbe Nachman's story the "Turkey Prince" with musical accompaniment and sounds effects. There was also a wonderful dvar torah about the use of music in avodat Hashem. The evening culminated in the men, young and old all getting up and dancing around! What a joy it was to see! Their new CD will soon be out so be sure to check it out, and if they come to your area be sure to check THEM out...or better yet go to Tsfat and visit! B'ezrat Hashem I will be there too!

Baby Steps Part 2

The baby has taken those first steps now and she is not so sure that this really is the best way to get around. She holds onto the furniture, timidly taking those shaky little steps and she cruises around a while. Holding on to each solid piece of furniture for security, she makes her way slowly around the room. Sometimes, if that is not quick enough for her, she will revert to crawling on the floor. Especially if she sees Mommy or Tatty! As time goes by and she becomes proficient in her new found skill she will walk more and more.

Babies cannot forget the excitement of walking! Eager to practice, they walk more and more, even running at times! As they develop, getting better, hardly ever do they return to crawling as they have found their new ambulatory skills to be the most efficient way of getting from place to place. You see once they have learned this skill, they do not go back. Young children, teenagers, adults, none of us purposely return to this crawling stage to get from one place to another. We cannot ever forget our days of walking. Once we reach this level we can never go back.

Recently at a shiur I heard this same message. The Rabbi was saying how once we reach each level spiritually we can never go back down from the Truth of that level we have learned. I really did not understand this at all. I thought about myself and how I have done things to lay them down again for a while. I began thinking about this concept and I realized that the truth is I could never forget a Torah Truth after I learned it. What does this mean? At those times in my life, after I have learned something and maybe not grasping it, I put it aside, I am just cruising the furniture for a while yet. I am just holding onto each piece of solid Torah Truth (the furniture) that I do know, to get around the room (my life). I take those small steps and sometimes I crawl a little. Finally then there are those days that I take my steps. As halting as they may be, I am still moving forward. I am still getting around, and B'ezrat Hashem (with G-d's help, my Abba's help) I will soon be running!

Baby Steps Part 1

This past week the little one I care for took her first step! You can hardly imagine the joy and elation that came from her bedroom that day. Her mother and I happened to BOTH be there when she took her first step towards her Mama! WOW! We both started squealing and dancing around the room! It is amazing that such a 'little' thing as taking a step could bring two grown women such absolute joy!

Rewind to earlier in the week when I was talking to my Racheli. She was so discouraged about how 'far behind' she was. "I am in this school and they are all FFB'S!" ( "Frum From Birth" meaning raised in Torah from birth) She did not think she was ever going to get it. She didn't read as fast as they do, daven (pray) as quickly, read Rashi as well etc. (Although between you and I, I can tell you she highly underestimates herself °Ü° ) To make matters worse, another young lady was taking some notes during a class and the teacher told her she really did not have to because she had such a solid knowledge of the subject. Note taking, he told her, was for the girls who did not have such a knowledgeable background. Now while I am sure he was trying to encourage the young lady and in no way was trying to insult my daughter, my daughter just felt worse and worse.

Baby steps, I told her, baby steps! Hashem is DELIGHTED with all you are learning and doing! It means so very much to him! Even more than a tzaddik's learning, I told her. Why? Because those baby steps toward Hashem are the truest, loveliest steps that anyone can take. Those precarious little steps made in trust and love are the most beautiful ever. And even if you tumble, you simply tumble forward into His arms. I told her to not underestimate herself and not to compare herself to others. What seems like tiny little baby steps to you and HUGE to Hashem! Just ask any loving parent...

The baby took her first steps and we jumped and we cried for joy!

Barukh Hashem!

PS. Thank G-d the girls at this seminary are stellar in all ways. They are nothing but kind and helpful to my Racheli, beautiful girls inside and out, but you know how it is...at the time she was still wishing she 'knew it all'.

A Very Good Question

My Tzivya and I stopped at a local convenience store to grab something real quick this week. She opted to stay in the car and wait for me as I was just going to run in and out. I was only gone a couple of minutes and when I returned I noticed she had been crying.

"What's wrong, Mami?", I asked her.

"Mama, did you know that our sentence in Mitzraim was cut short by two hundred years?"

"Yes, I did." I said

"Do you know why?", she asked.

"Not really, why?"

"Because Pharaoh had set other Jews over the slaves as overseers. He told them if they did not do their work that they were to beat them. The Jewish overseers were kind and compassionate to their fellow Jews. They did not beat them and so Hashem cut the sentence short."

I was still confused as to why she was crying.

Tzivya continued.

"You know how you get so upset when Racheli and I would argue?"

"Yeah..."

At that Tzivya started to cry again.

"Mama, imagine how Hashem feels about what is happening in Amona!"

I was stunned into silence, I couldn't say a word.

It is a very good question.


ADDENDA: While perusing some of my favorite blogs (see side bar) I think I found a very good answer to the very good question. Please check out "Does Hashem Really Care?"

Dedication to my SIL: A quote from Rebbe Nachman...you were right sis!

Rebbe Nachman says, "The whole battle is over a hairsbreadth. In other words, If someone wants to be victorious all in one go, it's impossible. But if all you have to do each time is move one hairsbreadth forward, you can! All you have to do is take a little step from bad to good."

Here's to all our baby steps closer to Hashem! Joy in the journey!

A quote from the Lubavitcher Rebbe

Inner Exile
-----------

It is not so much that we need to be taken out of exile. It is that the exile must be taken out of us.

~The Lubavitcher Rebbe
Rabbi Menachem Mendel Shneerson

On Spinning Wool and Praying with Kavanah

“She puts her hand to the spindle and her palm to the distaff.” I often wondered about this verse from Eishet Chayil (Proverbs 31). Spinning wool is not one of those womanly arts that too many of us have experienced. I was always fascinated by re-enactors at local fairs using a spinning wheel or a drop spindle. Their dexterity and the beautiful yarn coming from their fingertips spoke to me of womanly glory and quiet serenity. About five years ago I finally learned to spin with a drop spindle. My first attempts were sorry lumpy and bumpy creations. In spite of their lack of apparent beauty to me I persevered in this art. It was not easy but it was serene. It felt spiritual and quieted me when I felt on edge. The wool I spun into yarn felt like a connection, albeit a lumpy and bumpy one. My instructor assured me I would get better with practice and in a little time I too would be making fine yarn come from my fingertips. Then she looked a little wistful and told me that when that happened I would actually miss my lumpy, bumpy yarn creations. At the time I found that very hard to imagine, but it was true.
It reminds me of not so many years ago when I was learning to read the prayers from my siddur. I agonized with every letter and vowel. I wanted so much to pray in Hebrew, lashon kodesh, the holy tongue. I wanted to really connect with Hashem in this way. As I learned I felt the spirituality of the prayers connecting me to my Creator. I felt the serenity of time alone pronouncing each word, with such concentration, that I eagerly looked forward to my prayer time each day. It was not easy but it felt serene. It did not sound very beautiful to me but I was doing it. My teacher assured me that I would get better with practice and in time I too would be making fine brachot come from my lips. Then she too looked a little wistful and told me when that happened I would miss these days of absolute concentration and focus on each and every word. At the time I found that hard to imagine, but that too was true.
Now I spin quite well and can a rattle the morning brachot off in a couple of minutes. Although I don’t miss the lumpy yarn all that much, I do miss the focus I had in the beginning on my tefilla (prayer). Now, I have to work on maintaining concentration on what I am saying and the words that are coming from my lips. I have to work on pronouncing each letter and each word carefully.
I want the yarn of my prayers to come from a deeper place than just my lips. I want them to begin in the depths of my heart and flow from there. I want them to be slow and filled with the love I feel in my heart for my Father.

Things that make you say "hmmm?"

TOKYO (Jan. 19) - Gohan and Aochan make strange bedfellows: one's a 3.5-inch dwarf hamster; the other is a four-foot rat snake. Zookeepers at Tokyo's Mutsugoro Okoku zoo presented the hamster - whose name means "meal" in Japanese - to Aochan as a tasty morsel in October, after the snake refused to eat frozen mice.

This is quite a picture of the saying," keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

Do you really think they are getting along? And if they are, then what is our problem?

Although we can not be naive to the fact the snake cannot really be trusted, I mean he is a snake after all and my guess is he is simply lulling the mouse into a false sense of security.

hmmm...reminds me of a situation in my HomeTown.

Good Advice...Sing a niggun!

Here is a wonderful post called "When the words won't come," by Rabbi Lazer Brody. Go check it out!

Girl's Pajama Party

This is the night before Racheli left for Israel. We had a girlie pajama party. The youngest is three...we won't talk about the oldest. °Ü°

Righteous Women

In the merit of the righteous women of that generation were the Israelites delivered from Egypt

- Talmud, Sotah 11b

Mighty Ones in the Holy Land

Here I am in the U.S of A and I am missing my children so much. I was reading "Crossing the Narrow Bridge, a Practical Guide to Rebbe Nachman's Teachings", and I came across this quote from Rebbe Nachman that has comforted me greatly.

"Once, Rebbe Nachman gave lesson about the greatness of the Holy Land: To be a Jew means to rise time and again, to be forever reaching to ever greater levels. Whoever wants to be a Jew can only do so with the merit of the Holy Land. Getting there is a major battle. But when a person merits arriving in the Holy Land, he is called a "mighty one," for he has won the battle. (Likutey Moharan 1. 20 end)

My children are mighty ones. I pray I too can be a mighty one and merit to be in Eretz Israel soon.

A Quote from Rebbe Nachman

“ It's very good to speak out your heart to God as you would to a true good friend. ”
--Rebbe Nachman

To my friends

I have friends. I really do. They are coming out and allowing me freedom to grieve and to grow during this time. They are listening to me and offering nothing more than a shoulder and their open hearts. They are not shushing my pain but allowing me to feel it and grow from it. They assure me that all will be right and that I am normal. Wow, I am normal. What a concept!
I am so grateful to Hashem who has shown Himself a true Father to me. He has blessed me with such a wonderful family. He has given my the most amazing children and has afforded them this incredible opportunity. He has given me my dear friends. You know who you are but I did not know you. I did not even realize you were there. Thank you for revealing yourselves to me. Thank you more for loving me just as I am.

My John Deere Blankie

Sometimes you just wanna whip something up to make you feel good. So here is something I did. Nice and easy but awful cute and warm. If you haven't figured it out, I gotta thing about John Deere...all you Case International fans, back off, you're just jealous.

PS. I also have a thing about calenders, I have them all over the place. I don't know why really. My family thinks it's an Amish thing I picked up in Lancaster. Anyway, a friend brought me two new ones...lighthouses and John Deere.

"I can't believe YOU are actually letting her go!"

Y'know, if another person says this to me, I may forgo my naturally nonviolent ways :::cough, cough::: and slug them!

OK, maybe not, but really it is beginning to get annoying. People who do not homeschool, who do not raise their children the way that we do, totally misunderstand why we do what we do. They seem to think that we kept them home, protected them, filtered things, etc., because we wanted them to stay lame at home for the rest of their lives. What a terrible thing I did by not having television and pop culture all over my home. Who would want such a thing for their children?

We homeschool because there was no other option as far as we were concerned. We were certainly not sacrificing our children to the public school system, (no offense intended to those who do use the schools, I know some are very fine and wonderful children have come out of them), but for us we could not. We did not want the schools enforcing their beliefs, their ideas of right and wrong, their agenda, etc., on our children.

We did not want our children to grow up peer dependent. We wanted to spare them the agonies as much as possible of this slavery that young people so often find themselves in. Slavery to the opinions of Hollywood and it's minions, slavery to pop culture, fads, fashions and the opinions of their equally confused peers. Did our children have to struggle with any of these issues? Of course they did! We did not raise them in a cave after all. They had friends and these things sometimes came up, but they were secure in themselves already and if they had any questions they came to us.

We presented them life in it's beauty and in it's ugliness. We did not keep all of it away, we could not, but we did shelter them from the worse and we allowed them to experience the rest when they were ready and through our filters. We have dysfunction in our family just like the rest of America so they could not be spared of all sorrow.

Some accused us of over protecting our children. Tell me who among you, if you had as your own the Hope Diamond would not 'over protect' it? I dare say our children are more valuable than this mere trinket. Besides that, as I said before, we did not live as hermits on a mountaintop, so life happened every day all around us.

'You are raising hot house plants', I was told. Yep, I thought, indeed I am. Strong plants, growing deep and strong roots, to withstand any storm when they are ready to be transplanted outside. This is the whole point. We raised them to be strong and independent in themselves. To know that family is where it is at. That if you do not have faith and family you have nothing. That no matter what and not matter who, your family is always there for you. That your best friends should be the ones waiting at home for you at the end of the day. If you cannot respect and be kind to your parents and siblings, how can you treat others any better? If you do treat friends kinder than siblings there is something very wrong. We tried to give them a solid foundation to launch from. A safe place to strengthen their wings from which they would fly. They grew stronger and more secure in themselves and in the safety of their home. And now that the time has come and they are ready, they will take flight! This is what it was all about. To enable and empower them to leave when they were ready and not before. Not at the magic age of 18 because society says so. Not because they heard us say, I can't wait till they are all eighteen and out of the house.

Some folks just don't get it. They think it is all about us controlling and suffocating them. Quite the contrary. We helped them to grow strong and helped refine their character and nature. They are strong in their faith and and trust the Holy One, Most Blessed be He.

Our children have not always agreed with us, but they have always respected. We have not always agreed with them, we have always loved them and given them the freedom to grow. In doing that we grew as parents too and as human beings. We are all constantly being refined. You cannot believe I am letting her go?! Why not? Of course I am, because as a dear friend just told me, this is the best of homeschooling! This is where it goes into action. This is where are the principles and faith and everything else that is homeschooling becomes very practical. When they leave the nest and soar with the eagles! This is beyond my wildest dreams and I am most blessed and very proud of the children that Hashem has given me! I pray I make my Father proud too.



But those whose hope is in Hashem will have renewed strength; they will grow wings like eagles; they will run and not grow tired, they will walk and not grow weary. ~~Isaiah40:31

Blog, Blog, Blog

I have been blogging like crazy, especially since I have two other blogs to keep up with. I think I need to slow down, but it has been an outlet for me. I know why I am blogging so much. It is my escape from reality. I figure if I just keep busying myself, talking about this and that, I will not feel my sadness.
I feel so dumb feeling so sad about such a good thing. This is wonderful for my daughter. Opportunity of a lifetime and all that stuff!
So, instead of letting myself feel, I blog. I guess I will soon need 'bloggers anonymous'.
I am a mother though. I am allowed to feel this way, aren't I? I don't have to always be so strong, do I?
I won't allow myself a cry, not today. Today I want to rejoice with my daughter. Today I want to tell her she is going to have such a wonderful time in Tsfat. Today I will tell her not to be afraid of not making friends, fuhgetabout it! You will make all kinds of friends and have so much fun! I will tell her about all the torah she will learn and bring home to me. I will tell her that the time will fly and how wonderful it will be to see her brother again! Today I will be strong. I know she will miss us all as much as we will her, but we all know this is so good.

Sunday afternoon may be another story. At least until I get home from the airport and I pull it all together for my youngest again.

Y'know, motherhood is not for the faint of heart.

Philly Farmgirl's Farmyard Fantasies (Warning: Strictly Girl Talk)

A bath...ahhhh, the luxury of a long hot bath. Y'know, I think 'normal' ladies, (whoever they are) would take some sort of romance novel with them when partaking of a long deserved bath. At the very least one would think they would take the latest fashion magazine. They would put on some classical music, light a few candles and sink into the joy that is the bath tub. But not this true blue (or John Deere green, if you will) farmgirl. I decide to relax in the bath tub, with bath salts of my own making and the newest Murray McMurray Hatchery Catalog! Can I tell you? It was so grand!

I used to have chickens when I lived in Maryland. I miss them so much. There I was, in the tub, fantasizing and planning my barnyard full of black Australorps, white Orpingtons, Rhode Island Reds, and a few Black tailed Buff Japanese thrown in for good measure. What a beautiful rainbow that would be! If I were actually planning my barnyard, I think I might be a bit more practical, maybe not. When I had finished my bath, I laid my catalog down, sank back into the tub one more time and gave such a contented sigh. Oy, was that relaxing. No romance novel can give me the joy a real Farmgirl Fantasy can!

Jump Into the Sea of Faith

When we come to the shore of this sea how far are we prepared to go? Are we only ready to ‘get our feet wet,’ or are we prepared to jump into the sea of faith without thinking too much?...

I found this inspiring article on Breslov World by Rav Shalom Arush. Click here to read the whole thing. I think you will be very encouraged and blessed by it!

Jewish Farmer

I found this pic here on the web and thought it was just wonderful! There are so many images of other farmers and of course the Amish, that is was really fun for me to find this one of a Jewish Farmer. Granted, it is from 1920 but I still think this is wonderful.

Last Night of Chanukah...our Chanukiah

The last night of Chanukah was very quiet for us. Just the family at home. It was really wonderful. I thought I would share some pics of our chanukiah with you all. It really is beautiful all lit up. It is my prayer that we also continue to grow in mizvot and torah, growing more and more beautiful as each day passes, hastening the coming of Moschiach, speedily in our time.